How to Reconnect to your Feminine Self
When I lead Sacred Women’s Circles or sit in circle with a group of women, I am always overwhelmed with gratitude to be a woman. By nature, we are intuitive and wise, crafty and deeply connected to the elements. We are deeply devoted to our young and are the portal between the spiritual and physical realm. We are brave and loyal and fierce when we are pushed. Our bodies are an art that cycle with the moon and the earth. We are extraordinary beings that possess so much power and potential and deep wisdom.
Not all women recognize this as a gift though. When was the last time you were encouraged to stare at yourself in the mirror naked and truly love the person you see? When was the last time you heard a friend exclaim, “I LOVE being a woman!” Many of us have felt disconnected from our feminine selves for a long time, but haven’t known the way back.
I too struggled with balancing my feminine and masculine selves growing up. It is so common in our Western culture for masculine traits to be rewarded. Logic and step-by-step instruction is highly respected in our culture, very masculine traits, however young girls are taught that this is the way they need to be too. Emotions and intuition are quickly cast away as “girly” because “they don’t make sense.” I don’t think I ever heard someone say to me “Listen to your intuition.” I learned quickly that if I wanted to survive in this world, I needed to stop being so sensitive and emotional and adopt a masculine, logical mind. I was taught that everything needed to make sense and emotions and feelings were weak. Now, there is nothing wrong with thinking in a masculine sense. However, I do think it's wrong to teach boys and girls in the same way and propogate the masculine way of thinking on young girls.
It wasn’t until I heard the call to return to my feminine nature that I had even realized I had been operating in an almost entirely masculine mode. I had disconnected from my monthly cycles and felt shame about my body, I had replaced my intuition and gut feelings with precise logic and lived entirely in my head, but now I was feeling the need to ignite the woman within me. So I did.
If you, too, feel stuck in your journey as a woman or wish to connect to the traditional feminine wisdom, you are not alone.
Here are a few ways to reconnect to your Feminine self:
Work on cultivating your Intuition. Our intuition is the “gut feeling” we get about things. It guides us and tells us what is right and wrong. As young children, most girls are very intuitive and connected to their emotional self, however most of us have it drilled out of us before middle school. You CAN reconnect it.
Connect with a group of conscious women. Find a women’s group in your area and begin connecting with other women. Having close connections with other women helps guide us back to our feminine selves. The bond of sisterhood has been replaced with jealousy and competition for some, so make it a priority to find a group of women that are loving, open minded and supportive. Meetup.com is a great place to find women's groups in your area.
Read Women Who Run With the Wolves. If you haven’t read this book yet, your life is about to change. Find it. Buy it. Read it. That’s all I can say.
Create a sacred alter. Choose a space in your home that is quiet and that inspires you to create your sacred alter. An alter can be anything you want it to be. Most women choose to decorate a low table with items that are meaningful to them or that inspire them. Crystals, rocks, feathers, essential oils, seeds, pictures, candles, dried flowers, books and more can be used for your alter. Make it a reflection of you and also to who you want to become. You can sit at your alter each night or whenever is convenient for you to sit in silence and reconnect to yourself.
Create a personal sacred practice. Begin taking time for yourself daily. Whether that means taking the time to meditate at your alter, practicing yoga, writing, going for a walk, spending time in nature, cooking or swimming. Choose something that you love that will help you on this journey and dedicate time each day to it.
Connect to the moon. As women, our monthly cycles are generally about 28 days, the same length as a moon cycle. For hundreds of years, women menstruated with the moon and lived in synchronicity with the elements around them. I love hosting New Moon Ceremonies and Full Moon Ceremonies and inviting over a group of women to honor the moon and share my intentions and goals for the month. It can be a very powerful way to manifest your desires and reconnect with the moon. You can learn how to hold a Moon Ceremony here.
Make your menstrual time sacred. Most of us were not taught the sacredness of our menstrual cycle or ways to honor. Our menstrual time is our most intuitive time of the month and is also a time when we should be resting, replenishing ourselves and honoring ourselves. Treat yourself to a massage or spa day. Take a hot bath each night before bed. Indulge in your favorite hobby. Whatever it is that brings you joy AND replenishes you, do it. You can also offer your menstrual blood to the earth during this time if you are using a Mooncup.
The sooner you choose to love yourself and your body, the sooner you will be reunited with your feminine self. Choose to love your body, your menstrual flow, your emotions, your breasts and your womb. Choose to love all that you believe makes you a woman.
As more of us awake from the deep sleep, the more WOMEN we have in this world shining their brilliant lights. You are a woman, shine.